God’s Voice or My Desires? How to Know the Difference
Here's a question I hear often: "How do I know if I'm hearing God's voice or just listening to my own desires?"
It's a legitimate question, and the fact that you're asking it shows you care about getting it right. There is a real difference between what God is calling you to do and what you want to do, and often, those two things are in direct conflict.
Let me be blunt: God's calling rarely feels comfortable.
We live in a culture that celebrates following your dreams and pursuing your passions. "Listen to your heart," they tell us. "Do what makes you happy." "Follow your bliss." There is nothing wrong with joy or fulfillment. But here's what nobody tells you: God's calling on your life might ask you to do something that feels completely wrong by the world's standards.
Are You Forgetting the Main Thing?
Jason's bowls tournament was approaching quickly, and my kitchen had transformed into what resembled a professional bakery. Every surface was dusted with flour, mixing bowls were stacked in the sink, and the sweet smell of baking filled our cottage. My husband had volunteered to handle all the refreshments for the event, bless him, which meant he had been baking all day. (By the way, he's a VERY good cook!)
I was in my office, fingers flying across the keyboard as I worked on my latest book, when I heard a groan from the kitchen that could only mean disaster.
"Oh, for crying out loud!"
The frustration in Jason's voice pulled me from my writing zone. I found him staring at a tray of unbaked scones, his flour-covered hands on his hips.
"What's wrong?"
He pointed at the offending dough. "I forgot the cheese."
An Unyielding Grey
I thumbed through my Bible again, looking for some verse to leap off the page and shout, "This is the way—walk in it!" Silence.
I prayed until my knees ached. "Lord, just tell me what to do. Should I continue in this particular area of the ministry, or should I spend more time in this other area? Should we continue in our current "game plan" or pursue a new approach? A simple yes or no would be lovely!"
But heaven remained quiet. No burning bush. No writing on the wall. Just the persistent, foggy grey of uncertainty.
Have you been there? That spiritual twilight zone where you've done everything "right"—prayed fervently, studied Scripture diligently, sought godly counsel—and still find yourself standing at a crossroads without a traffic light in sight?
It's maddening, isn't it? Especially for those of us who like plans, clarity, and knowing exactly which box to tick.
Walking the Line of Faith
Have you ever watched a tightrope walker? It's fascinating how they maintain their balance, shifting their weight ever so slightly from one side to the other. One wrong move could spell disaster. I often feel like that tightrope walker in my spiritual life, especially when it comes to finding the balance between doing and waiting.
Just yesterday, I sat at my desk, staring at a blank document on my computer screen. I had a Bible study to prepare, several blog posts due, and ministry correspondence waiting for responses. The weight of responsibility pressed heavily on my shoulders. Should I forge ahead with my plans, or was God trying to tell me to wait? Was my drive to complete these tasks stemming from my perfectionist nature, or was it truly God's leading?
Helpless But Hopeful
At the time of this writing, it is three days before our biggest community event of the year. I’ve been planning and preparing for weeks, hoping to iron out every wrinkle so the day will run smoothly and successfully. But you know what the Bible says about man's plans, right?
About a week and a half ago, my back decided to throw one of its fits. This wasn't its everyday pinch, sting, and ache. This was lying flat in the bed for an entire week! Yup, a whole week where I couldn't work on the mountain of things that needed to be done. Oh, how helpless and frustrated I felt.
After a visit with my osteopath, I finally started feeling some relief and could start pecking away at a chore here and there as long as I took long rest and stretch breaks in between.