Do you ever feel like the work you're doing is in vain? Do you ever look at what you've accomplished and determine that it's not enough? Do you ever find yourself wondering if you're truly following God's will or if you've missed a "Turn now" sign somewhere?
I'm what you would call an "overthinker." I think too long and too hard about things that should be obvious. Believe it or not, I actually missed the yield sign on my driving test because the correct answer just seemed too obvious. I graduated with a 4.0 GPA, and I missed the yield sign!!!!! Why? Why do I do that? Why do I over-complicate things?
I think somewhere, deep in the back of my mind, I'm convinced that everyone is out to trick me. That's the only conclusion I can draw. I simply have this frustrating tendency to think too much into things.
In my Christian walk, this can prove to be a real problem. I'm walking along, doing the will of God. . . or am I? Suddenly, in the midst of my walk, I doubt my purpose and my calling. Sure, I know God called me to do this, but what about this? Within minutes of the doubt surfacing in my mind, I have a list of reasons why I think I'm on the wrong path. Maybe I misunderstood God's calling. Maybe I didn't hear correctly. Maybe I followed my own wishes instead of his. Maybe, maybe, maybe.
Did you see what just happened? I went from productive to paranoid in a matter of minutes. Why? Doubt. I despise doubt, but I seem to be good buddies with it. The scary part is that I usually don't realize what's happening until someone points it out to me. Doubt has me so self-absorbed and distracted that I truly can't focus on anything else. . .especially the Lord's will.
So why am I writing this? Well, because I've been in that place (this week, actually), and I have a feeling that some of you may be there too. There are times when we will question everything we do and the motives behind those actions. We want to serve the Lord so much that we become distracted and weighed down by doubt of whether or not we're serving in the right capacity. We must be on guard. When we get to this place, we're running around in circles, chasing our tails instead of fighting the good fight. This is exactly what Satan wants.
Instead, let's keep doing the Lord's will. If we're not sure what that is, let's just continue to do the work we're sure of. If the Lord wants to move us or to add to our ministry, He will give us a clear sign. When I think back to all the major decisions in my life, I remember a very CLEAR signal from God. He will keep us in His will as long as we desire to stay there. He won't let us stray.
Let's get busy. We all have a job to do!