I'm not sure if I'll be able to get through this post without tears or not. As I type this, Mitch is once again at the vet after having undergone another surgery on his paw. The attempt to remove his stitches resulted in a hemorrhaging blood vessel which had to be repaired. At this point, I have no idea what kind of recovery time we're looking at, and frankly, I'm not sure if my heart can bear to think about it. All I know is that my faith is growing weak, and I'm finding it more difficult to find peace in the midst of the storm.
Nevertheless, as I thought about what to post today, I was reminded of a thought that has struck me several times over the past few weeks. Each time we've had to wrap Mitch's paw or administer medication, or place that confounded cone back on his head, I've looked him in the eye and assured him that he was not being punished but that we were doing these things for his own good. Each time I said those words, I felt a nudge in my heart as if God were saying the same to me. "Dana, I know this is hard, but you're not being punished. Believe me when I tell you that this is for your own good. Yes, it hurts. Yes, it's unpleasant. Yes, I know you don't understand. But trust me. I have your best interest at heart."
Before he left for work, Jason looked me in the eye and said, "Spend some time with God today, and find peace." All morning long, I've been asking myself, "How do I find peace? Where do I find peace?" I was struck with the memory of the Sunday School lesson I taught on Sunday morning. It was on being sheltered in the promises of God. That is where I can find peace. That is where I can find strength to carry on. Christian author Sheila Walsh says it best: "Jesus is the eternal place of promise, the place where a miracle can happen--because for every problem, there is a promise."
I won't say this is going to be easy because I know better. But I know it is possible, and I'm not alone. God's taking care of me, even if it's in ways I don't understand. The best thing for me to do is to trust in Him and place the entire situation in His hands. He can certainly handle it better than I can!