I cannot describe to you how the Lord has used that phrase to get my attention this week. Let it go. It seems I have a real problem with that. Let it go. It sounds so simple, so easy, but it's not. As the phrase replayed over and over again, I searched my heart and asked myself a very difficult question: what am I still holding onto that I need to let go? The list the Lord has revealed is staggering. Control, expectations of everything going the way I want them to go, bitterness, fear, anger towards God for not working within my time frame, frustration with myself and others for not living up to my standards, and sadly, the list goes on.
Don't get me wrong, I've taken each of these things to the Lord in prayer. I've laid these burdens and faults down at His feet. And I thought I walked away empty-handed, but evidently, such is not the case because here I stand with my arms loaded with a pile of junk I was never intended to carry. I tried to lay it down. I tried to let it go. But it seems to have followed me on my way.
When I decided to serve the Lord, I knew it was not going to be an easy task. I knew surrender was going to have to be a daily thing, and I was positive it was not going to be easy. I had illusions, however, that the more I grew spiritually, the easier it would be to surrender daily, but I fear the opposite is true, at least in my life. The more I learn about Christ, the harder I try to serve Him, the more I grow to love Him, the more difficult it seems to be to let everything go, to truly surrender my all. Why is that? It makes no sense. Why is it I have no problem trusting God with my spiritual life but I struggle so trusting Him with my physical life? Why is it so hard to just let go? To let go of my expectations of what I think my life should be. To let go of my need for control. To let go of my worry and fear over what tomorrow may hold.
The result of such total surrender would be peace and joy. I want that. I really do. But it means I have to make the sacrifice. I have to give my all, holding nothing back. Total surrender. God never promised it would be easy, but He did promise it would be worth it.
Oh, Lord, please help me to let it go! I want Your best for me. Get me out of the way, so that You can work in me and through me. I'm tired of lugging around these heavy burdens. I give them to You, Lord, and ask You to deal with them as You see fit. Please give me the strength to surrender my life and my all to You day after day, and to do so with joy and gladness. I love you, Lord, though I know I often fail to show it. I want to be used of You, so once again, Lord, I let it go. I lay it all down at Your feet. I am Yours. Do what You will. Thy will be done!
Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. - Hebrews 12:1-2