Was Blind But Now, Well, I'm Still Blind

Despite the chilling temperatures yesterday, Jason and I decided to take the dogs out for an afternoon hike.  It sounds crazy, I know, but with Jason's unpredictable work schedule, we've discovered that we have to make the best of every opportunity.  He finished work a little earlier than anticipated, leaving just enough time to get in a short hike at one of our favorite hiking locations.  So, we layered up our clothes, packed the backpack, loaded up the dogs and headed out.

By the end of the hike, darkness was falling, making it difficult for me to see, especially since I wasn't wearing my glasses and I'm night blind.  Noticing the failing light, I commented, "Wow, it's getting harder to see."  At that point, Jason (who was following close on my heels) wrapped his gloved hands over my eyes and jokingly said, "Let's see how well you walk by faith rather than sight."  In short, not well at all.

It was an eerie sensation to walk down the narrow trail with no idea where I was going.  I knew the path descended, but I couldn't tell where or when without my sight.  I feared every step, anxious that I would trip or run headlong into some obstacle.  After only a couple of seconds, I stopped walking and shook my head.  "I don't like this.  I don't like it at all!"  He laughed and removed his hands from my eyes, but inside I still felt blinded because I realized just how much I felt the same way in my spiritual walk.

I knew Jason was guiding me through the woods.  Deep down I knew that, even though I couldn't see what lay ahead, he could, and he cared enough for me to not let me fall or run into something.  Yet, even though I knew these things, I was still afraid.  I had no faith.  And unfortunately, I find the same is often true in my daily walk with the Lord.  I know He is guiding me.  I know He can keep me from falling.  I know that He can see what I cannot.  Yet I'm still afraid.  Afraid to walk.  Afraid to trust.  Afraid to turn over that control.  Too many times I find myself stopping and trying to rip off the blindfold, saying the same thing I said to Jason last night, "I don't like this.  I don't like it at all!"

Why is it so frightening to walk by faith?  Why is it so difficult to place complete trust in the One who is all-powerful?  How can a mature believer still be so immature when it comes to faith?  I wish I had answers for you, but I'm afraid today all I have is questions.  Perhaps you have an answer.  Maybe you've experienced the same fear of faith and discovered a way to conquer that fear.  If so, please share it below.  I'm sure we would all like to know.

(For we walk by faith, not by sight:) - II Corinthians 5:7