When the Body Attacks Itself

I still remember the first time I said it out loud: “Lord, my body is trying to kill me.”

It had been one of those days with joints on fire, muscles shaking, and fatigue so heavy I felt like I was wading through molasses. Meanwhile, my immune system was acting like an overzealous security guard, tackling anything that moved, including innocent bystanders like my thyroid and joints.

In my mind, my body had become the enemy.
And then there was that verse: “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.” (Psalm 139:14)

I’ll be honest. At that moment, I really struggled with that verse.

“Fearfully and wonderfully made?” I grumbled. “Lord, this feels more like fearfully and wonderfully malfunctioning.”

For those of us with autoimmune disease or chronic illness, there’s a special kind of heartbreak in feeling like your own body has betrayed you.